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...TRAINING LABORERS
FOR THE VINEYARD...
-RECRUITING WARRIORS-
WE MUST BREAK THESE CHAINS
THAT ARE BINDING
OVER OUR CITIES.
A Word and Prayer For Bitterness
The Secret Killer
A bitter person is one who has unknowingly invited external circumstances to determine their inner attitude, which moment by moment reduces them to a dependence on mental crutches. Overhearing a young man say, “Life for me is wonderful. It’s just the people in it that get under my skin.”
The fact is, I’ve never met an individual that has not been betrayed, had promises broken or been dragged into the unjust courts of cruel public opinion. Perhaps all of us, at a certain point in life, have felt harmed or hurt; but what’s not always evident is that at those moments, we are the most vulnerable to becoming bitter. It is when we allow the hurt to germinate in our hearts that bitterness and resentment will take root.
An unforgiving spirit with a negative and critical attitude full of hatred best portrays the secret little death seed called bitterness. It is self-destructive because it overcomes us and adversely affects us, perhaps more than anything else in life.
There are many things that can produce bitterness such as: rejection, prolonged sickness, loss, criticism, insensitivity, rudeness, abandonment, unfulfilled promises and unrealized dreams. Someone once said, “Life is 10% of what happens to us and 90% of how we respond to what has happened to us.” It is therefore incumbent upon us to handle hurt triumphantly and not let it turn into resentment.
Sidney Harris once wrote, “A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past; he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future.” There are many who are in a love-hate affair with bitterness, who seek to justify holding on to it and are not alert to the fact that it is a serious problem that can have damaging spiritual, emotional and physical consequences. It has been said that a rattlesnake, if backed far enough into a corner, will occasionally become so angry and annoyed that it will, in effect, wound itself. This is clearly what can result from entertaining bitterness and resentment against others —a pact with oneself to commit emotional suicide. We fool ourselves into thinking that we are getting even and harming others by holding onto ill feelings and hatred, but at the end of the day, the greater injury is always inflicted on ourselves.
A bitter person is one who has unknowingly invited external circumstances to determine their inner attitude, which moment by moment reduces them to a dependence on mental crutches. More often than not, quiescent in every man is a venom of unexpected bitterness, an unhealthy resentment, a strong prevailing power that can damn and easily produce hatred towards the life of another human being; a feeling of being trapped by cruel emotions, of having trusted and been tricked by friends, of being the powerless victim of blind rage and the recipient of life’s ultimate trick: a seat on the lonely throne of self-pity.
After penning a series of sensible and solid exhortations pertaining to the former life before Christ, Paul urges the laying aside of everything that is contrary to God. His message in Ephesians 4:25-32 can be summarized as follows: He persuades them to avoid lying in verse 25; anger in verse 26; theft, verse 28; corrupt and corrupting conversation, verse 29; grieving the Holy Spirit, verse 30; bitterness, evil speaking, and malice, verse 3l; and entreats them to manifest in their conversation with each other a spirit of kindness and forgiveness, verse 32.
Interestingly, Paul probably wasn’t thinking of the health implications and ramifications when he wrote two of the most important verses in the Bible: “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:31-32). Nevertheless it is noteworthy that the word bitterness suggests a long-standing resentment; it is the spirit that refuses to be reconciled.
We presently have mastered the fine art of brooding over past insults and injuries that can never be changed as evidenced by the fact that so many of us have a way of nursing our bitter resentment by keeping it close and cozy. We should pray daily that God would give us grace and teach us how to really forgive and to forget these unhealthy, prolonged negative emotions.
James paints a colorful portrait of a man of wisdom side-by-side with a bitter man when he writes, “But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy” (James 3:14-17).
Hebrews 12:15 warns us about the effects of bitterness, “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.” Paul is describing a root that lies latent in a man's heart; it is a corrupted root or gall of bitterness that is capable of springing up and bringing forth unpleasant fruit.
In his dynamic Sermon on the Mount, Jesus gave a heads up to his disciples regarding the detection of false prophets. It always begins at the root: Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit (Matthew 7:16-18).
We should always be mindful that bitterness does not harm the person who has hurt us; it only hurts us. Also remember that the circumstances we have suffered in the past cannot be changed. The best way to effectively deal with them is by letting go. On the cross, in the midst of life’s worst crisis and contradiction, Jesus chose to let it go by saying, “Father, forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing.”
Forgiveness can, with time, dissolve bitterness and come to an end when we learn to forgive others for the wrong they have done to us. Forgiveness can also be a source of emotional, psychological and spiritual healing because in forgiving others we decide that we will not be controlled by the trespass against us, nor allow any past situations to make us bitter again.
Forgiveness is never a sign of a compromise, but instead is a direct link to confront issues, as well as a way to neutralize hurt's negative impact on us. Quite appropriately Paul pens a proactive solution to these detrimental and destructive emotions, “Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32).
I have sadly watched people over the years who, while under the spell of bitterness and unchecked anger, have burned down their own houses just to kill a rat (which always seems to escape at the last minute through some small cracks in the wall).
While others have even prematurely passed on to the next life with the personal escort of bitterness: the secret killer.
Prayer
In the mighty name of Jesus I release all anger, all unforgiveness and all bitterness upon me right now. I press forward and give it to you Lord. I forgive my self and believe that you have forgiven me. I let you have it and from this time forward, I no longer want to hold this trick of the enemy in my life. I break the cords of despair and I uproot the seeds of bitterness from the soil of my heart and mind. I destroy the evil plans that were set for me and I walk into the light of victory and freedom from all despair. I give it to you fully, and I thank you that according to your word... the "FIRE" of the Holy Spirit has cleansed me and I am free by the blood of Jesus.
DON'T GET BITTER ........ GET BETTER!